Friday 6 December 2013

Buffy The Vampire Slayer, “Ted" Review (2x11)

Brief Synopsis: “Buffy has parental issues when Joyce comes home with a boyfriend, the computer expert and master chef, Ted, whose charming personality impresses everyone. Everyone except Buffy that is, who is not at all willing to give her mother up to someone new. Even Willow and Xander seem to love him, and Buffy must find a way to prove that her fears about Ted are something more than simple jealousy.”


"What's My Line Part One & Two" (2x09 & 2x10) quick link here                                            "Bad Eggs" (2x12) quick link here


Two quick notes before we get started...

1)    I will be reviewing the episodes in bullet point form. This is because it makes the reviews simple to read, and helps break up the text.
2)    If you are watching the show for the first time along with these reviews, please be warned that there may be a few spoilers for things that haven’t happened yet.

With that being said, let’s get started, shall we?




I have a confession for you all. I love this episode. I love it more than is natural. I may have this ranked as high as my 7th favourite episode of this season. A season which is consistently excellent (after episode 6) and has episodes such as “School Hard”, “Halloween”, “Surprise”, “Innocence”, “Bewitched, Bothered & Bewildered”, “Passion”, “I Only Have Eyes For You”, “Becoming Part One” and “Becoming Part Two”, amongst others. To me, this episode is every bit as good as most of those episodes. I know that’s not a popular opinion amongst the fandom in general, but I think that is a disservice to the brilliance of this episode.
This episode revolves around Joyce’s new boyfriend, Ted. After the introduction of Ted, I thought this episode was going to be about Buffy having to deal with a very normal issue (a potential stepfather), whilst fighting some form of baddie in the background and having to try to juggle these two lives...oh how wrong I was. 
The most horrific part of this episode isn’t creepy robot Ted, it isn’t Ted having his first four wives in a closet, it isn’t Ted coming ‘back from the dead’...it’s walking in on your mother kissing a stranger in the kitchen. Worst. Nightmare. Ever.
Rest in peace, John Ritter. John was a terrific actor and an amazing choice of guest star. Far too many Buffyverse actors have died younger than they should have (Glenn Quinn, Andy Hallett, Robin Sachs, John Ritter, Genevieve Holt, and Angelo Spizzirri to name a few). This episode simply wouldn’t work without John Ritter. If Ted was played by a less competent actor than John, the episode wouldn’t hold the emotional weight that it does. When I think about what makes the Buffyverse better than other television shows, I think about a number of things... 1) The quality of acting 2) The strong storylines 3) The character development 4) The relationships between the main characters 5) The dialogue 6) The music 7) The high-quality of guest actors. John Ritter is the perfect example of a high-quality guest actor. The remarkable thing about this is that the quality of guest actor was very high right from the beginning!
I’d be remiss if I didn’t inform you that “beg to differ” became 9-year-old Shangel’s catchphrase.
Jenny: “You make me feel bad that I don’t feel better.”

Ouch. Poor Giles. Good on Jenny for being honest, but still...I feel so sorry for Giles. He can never escape his past. It’s always there in the background. Just like Spike, just like Angel...you can never truly make amends for the lives you’ve taken.

There is a string of episodes in this season where I start to really love and appreciate Buffy and Angel as a couple. It started during “What’s My Line Part One” and continues until Angel loses his soul. Before “What’s My Line Part One”, Buffy and Angel were too damn angsty together. It was always drama, drama, drama...and a little more drama. By the time “Ted” comes along, they have become a stable couple. This episode holds another completely heart-warming ‘Bangel’ moment, and you cannot take that away from me. Angel seems to understand Buffy by this point. He can empathise with her living in two different worlds (as he’s doing the same thing himself as a vampire with a soul).
Angel: “Loneliness is about the scariest thing there is.”

Angel is very wise. Since overcoming my battles with depression, I’ve often quoted this line on my Buffyverse fan page on Facebook. After my best friend died in 2007, three weeks before my 18th birthday, I went into a downward spiral. I lost the will to live. It didn’t matter how many people were around me, I always felt alone inside my own head. In reality, I wasn’t alone at all. I had people who were there for me, but I couldn’t feel them there. The hardest part of the 4-year battle with depression was the loneliness. The realisation that I would never talk to my best friend again, that he’d never see me grow up, that he’d never see me get married (if I ever do), that he’d never meet my children (if I ever have any), along with the fact that I felt so alone in general, were some of the main catalysts for my attempted suicide in 2011. Loneliness is a killer. Loneliness makes the world a very dark place to be. If any of you out there reading this are currently going through a rough period in your life, please remember that life does get better. It’s never too late to turn it all around. Trust me, I’m living proof.

What’s this? A mini-golf session? In Sunnydale? In the daylight?! Shenanigans are clearly afoot. Joss would never allow such adorable bonding without there being a sinister reason for it. He’s allergic to happiness.
...there it is, Ted just threatened to slap Buffy. 
“Ted” is relatively unique in that it’s not until about 25 minutes in that you know what/who the ‘monster-of-the-week’ is. The subtlety of this episode is something to behold. When I first saw this episode, I had no idea that Ted was anything other than a regular human being. However, watching the episode for a second time, there are some subtle hints along the way like “I’m not wired that way” and “Nobody beats the machine”, but I didn’t pick up on them at all.
This episode is so realistic sometimes that it’s creepy. Around Joyce and the Scoobies, Ted acts like the perfect father-figure. He’s charming, friendly, and treats Buffy well and with respect. However, behind closed doors when Buffy and Ted are alone, Ted is a creepy, scary, abusive person. This is the way that most abuse works; behind closed doors where nobody else can see what is going on. I’m not going to get into a deep talk about my past, but abuse and bullying by a stepparent is something that I can greatly identify with. I’ve been there myself. Perhaps that’s why I like this episode more than your average “Buffy The Vampire Slayer” fan. I can identify with Buffy’s struggles in this episode with scary accuracy. I swear, some scenes in this episode caused me to have ‘Vietnam flashbacks’.

I can’t believe that Joyce didn’t believe Buffy when Buffy told her that Ted had threatened her! She believes this new guy in her life that she barely knows over her own daughter?! I know that Joyce has those happy drugs in her system, but they don’t make her more susceptible to Ted, they just make her happier and more compliant in general. This is one of the only times in all seven seasons where I completely don’t understand Joyce’s thought- process or actions. From season three onwards, I think that she’s an almost-perfect mother, but in this season she definitely makes some questionable decisions.
Ted has a date set for THE WEDDING? Creepy, oh so very creepy. They’ve been together for, like, a week!
If there was one word to describe this episode, it would be ‘uncomfortable’. I’m not just talking about after Ted ‘dies’ either. The scene where Buffy, Joyce, and Ted are having dinner is so uncomfortable that I wanted to claw my eyes out.
There are two scenes that make this episode go from ‘good’ to ‘awesome’, and both of them involve Buffy and Ted. The first of which is when Buffy comes back from patrolling and Ted is sat in her bedroom with her diary in his hand. Remember, we all think that Ted is human at this point. Ted completely shattered Buffy’s right to privacy and then threatened to tell Joyce about what was written in the diary. After Ted hit Buffy, Buffy kicked Ted’s ass (and rightfully so). Then...TED IS DEAD! TED. IS. DEAD. For about 5 minutes of this episode, we are led to believe that Buffy had killed a human being. If this story had turned out to be true, the entire show would have been flipped on its head for a very long time. Yes, Ted was a jerk. Yes, Ted struck Buffy and deserved to get his ass kicked...but, if Ted actually was human, Buffy would have been a murderer. We all see how that plays out in season three when Faith accidentally kills Allan Finch. That could have been Buffy in this episode! It could have been Buffy that was downward spiralling into darkness.

Ted: “Or what? You’ll slay me? I’m real. I’m not some goblin you made up in your little diary. Psychiatrists have a word for something like this: delusional. So from now on, you’ll do what I say, when I say, or I show this to your mother, and you’ll spend your best dating years behind the walls of a mental institution.”

1) How amazing is John Ritter during this speech? Goosebump-inducing performance.
2) Did anyone else instantly flash to season six’s “Normal Again” in relation to the mental institution part?
3) This speech encircles everything that this episode is about (until the big reveal that Ted is a robot). Ted is a jerk, and he’s someone dating Buffy’s mother, but he’s not supernatural (or so we think). Being the Slayer, does Buffy have the right to kill an evil human? Is an evil human any less bad than an evil vampire or demon? Of course, this gets explored in great detail during the third season due to Faith and Buffy’s vastly different stances on what being a Slayer means, but this episode lays the groundwork for that in a lot of ways.

Ted’s ‘death’ leads to some of the greatest acting from Sarah Michelle Gellar that I’ve seen thus far. She plays the raw, numb desperation so well. Buffy thinks that she’s killed a person. This instantly reverts her back to being a sixteen-year-old girl - “Mom, I didn’t mean to hurt him.” The innocence of this statement is simply heartbreaking.
And then...
TED’S ALIVE! Ted appears behind Buffy and says “Beg to differ”, and I screamed so loudly at my television that the neighbours must have thought I was being attacked. HOW IS TED ALIVE? WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?! I swear, Ted appearing behind Buffy is one of the most shocking moments in “Buffy The Vampire Slayer” history! Then, after all that drama, WHY ARE THERE WIRES STICKING OUT OF TED’S ARM?! WHY DOES HE KEEP YELLING RANDOM PHRASES?! IS HE HAVING A STROKE?!
Jenny shot Giles with a crossbow bolt! I completely forgive the creepiness of this episode for that singular moment alone. That was so hilarious. It came at the perfect time as well. Up to this point the episode had been so dark and depressing. Plus, it sends a positive message into the world...when in doubt on how to get someone back, let them shoot you with a crossbow bolt.
Ted: “Daddy’s here.”

...and we’re back to creepy again...

Just when I thought this episode wasn’t capable of getting more intense and creepy, we find out this nugget of information... HE KEEPS HIS FIRST FOUR WIVES’ BODIES IN THE FUCKING CLOSET! It was a smart choice to not show the audience what was in there. Our beautifully twisted minds came up with things more disturbing than they could have showed us.
This episode is not kind to Buffy Summers as a character.  There is a moment in this episode where Buffy regains her power from the man that has been abusing her and manipulating those around her... “Uncle Teddy, this house is mine! *smacks Ted in the face with a frying pan*”...now that’s how you end an episode about abuse. With a good frying pan to the face.
Giles and Jenny are back on good terms again! All is right in the world! What a happy ending to this episode. I’m sure their love will blossom and last for seasons and seasons to come. This is Joss Whedon after all, what are the chances of him killing one of them off in the next six episodes?...
I still completely believe that Willow learned all of her Buffybot repairing skills from meddling with disassembled Ted parts. That’s troubling on so many levels.
Why can’t Joyce ever have a normal relationship? Like, ever? I really wish Joyce and Giles had a fling at some point. I can see it now...Giles sneaking out of the window as Buffy is sneaking in from patrolling, Giles accidentally leaving his “kiss the librarian” mug at the Summers’ house...it would have been comedy gold.


Quote Of The Episode

Buffy: “Vampires are creeps.” 

Giles: “Yes. That's why one slays them.”

Buffy: “I mean, people are perfectly happy getting along and then vampires come and they run around and they kill people and they take over your whole house, they start making these stupid little mini-pizzas and everyone's like, ‘Oh, look! A mini-pizza!’ but I'm telling you, I have... “

Giles: “Buffy, I believe the subtext here is rapidly becoming, uh, text.”


I love that Buffy is having a crisis that is so completely normal. Buffy resents Joyce having a new man in her life. This is something that many, many people deal with.


FINAL SCORE: 8/10


So what are your thoughts on "Ted"? Did you enjoy this episode? Dislike it? Let me know all your thoughts in the comments section below!

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10 comments:

  1. When I first saw this episode I HATED Ted right from the beginning. I have a daughter and am remarried so I thought I'd never act like Joyce. Many years later I found out my husband had some of Ted's flaws. He never harmed my daughter physically but the emotional abuse can be just as bad. Although she is strong, she doesn't talk to him anymore and I carry a lot of guilt. Although it is hard to watch, I can relate to Joyce and say never again. P.S. we are still married.

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  2. I’m glad you like Ted! I feel validated. I keep hearing people say how it’s such a horrible episode, but I thought it was creepy, clever, surprising, and deep – like other great Buffy episodes! I agree that John Ritter gave a chillingly perfect performance.

    Is it awful that I prefer angsty Bangel? When they’re holding hands and being shmoopy, that’s when I roll my eyes. Not that I have a problem with stable relationships, in practice…it’s just that for it to feel authentic and heartwarming instead of just goopy on screen, I have to believe in it in a way I just can’t for those two. (That’s not a comment on chemistry, more on how the relationship was written and who the characters are at this point.)

    Loneliness *is* terrifying. Poor Buffy, I was so angry for her in this episode – there aren’t very many things she really has. Her mom, her friends, her slaying...that’s why episodes like this are such a punch to the gut. When people like Ted or Faith come in and start taking away what little solid ground she feels like she has, no wonder she goes a little mental! I would too.

    Ted is chilling like the Mayor is chilling. Friendly exterior – threaten pain and destruction with a smile.

    Murderer? Wouldn’t it still have been self-defense? I’m not saying Buffy should go around provoking all the human baddies to attack her so she can kill them and rationalize it, but I feel like even in a totally human, real-world context, hitting someone who’s attacking you is okay. (Of course there’s the super-strength issue, but still. Principle.)

    After feeling so frustrated and helpless throughout most of the episode, Buffy getting to hit Ted and not feel bad about it is so cathartic! I’m especially glad that Joyce gets to see Ted for who he really is, and that the relationship between Joyce and Buffy is restored by the end. How awful if Buffy had dispatched of Ted and Joyce had blamed her for it?

    Hahaha I love the image of a Joyce/Giles fling you paint. New headcanon!!
    Great quote. Subtext becoming, uh, text. :) It’s that kind of wordplay that helped me fall in love with this show in the first place.

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  3. You are not the only one who thinks Ted is underrated. Ans I love that Giles quote at the end.

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  4. Ted creeps me out. I mean, really creeps me out. More than vampires. Vampires aren't real, but people (without the robot part) like Ted exist. Ted is a predator, and there are many predators like that in our world. You chose the right word Shane, uncomfortable. It's a foray into reality, in a fantasy show. I mean, we've seen reality in Buffy, but they're in situations, relationships. Here it's a person, an evil one..
    Well, other than that, I think it's a good episode too! I just want to scream at Joyce, tell her that she shouldn't choose Ted over Buffy, tell her to wake the f*** up, that he's not a good person, but a serial killer... Poor Joyce :(

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  5. This episode is definitely nowhere near the top of my favorite Buffy episodes list, but it's a decent episode. Like Enza said, though, Ted really creeps me out. Like really. I loved John Ritter very much, but Ted is so creepy!

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  6. I didn't think this episode was any kind of good the first time I watched it, the only think that I remembered about it was the creepy robot in it lol. But I've gotta say that after the rewatch I really started to appreciate it. And your review helped a lot :)

    About your list of things that make Buffy and Angel so good I couldn't agree more with you. Without all those things, the great actors, the great stories, the great music, the great direction, the scenery... everything is combined to make them as great as they are.

    The only other thing that I want to say is *hugs *hugs *huuuuuugs* for you, your story broke my heart, I already knew about your best friend but I didn't know the rest of it, and I want you to know that if you needed anything at all, I'm here for you, though I know you're already one of the strongest people I know :)

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  7. Ted freaked me out from the beginning. He was so creepy and Stepford Husband. My jaw dropped when he threatened to slap Buffy. I felt so bad for her when she thought she had killed him. She was treated like a pariah at school with no one talking to her except the Scoobies and they were freaked a bit too. John Ritter did such a good job playing Ted.
    Just a world of creepy!!
    -Tash McInnes

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  8. Ahhhh...I'm so surprised that you love this episode. I ranked it as my least favorite. It just didn't fit the series - anywhere. Seriously in a town built on the Hellmouth, overrun with demons and mostly vampires we have to worry about a robot (who's not Buffybot) I've said it before, Joyce was a smart woman, she wouldn't have fallen so fast and hard all willy nilly. Your review is terrific, I will just never be sold on the validity of this episode. I do miss John Ritter, he was a great comedic talent.

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  9. As KAren R. said, the hurdle with this ep. is that, except for Buffy's super-abilites, it's straight s-f-, not Buffyverse. (Unless the helmouth expalins how tedin the 50s could design a robot we can't do yet 15 yeras later.)
    Buffy went beyond slef-defense, which is a complicated issue. What happend was she kept hititng him, afetr she had obviously neutralized him as a threat. (same reason I can't watch Thelma and Louise- she shot the guy after he had alreayd fully backed off. I can't handle stories, no mater how good, about sympathetic people who are stone cold guilty, so I popped the DVD out and never went back.

    Note: at this point Joyce doesn't know Ted was a robot.

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  10. Meh, this is an okay but ultimately forgettable filler episode. If not for John Ritter, it would be unremarkable.

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